The makings of a green dress

I bought this fabric and didn't have a CLUE what to do with it. After looking at it for a million years I decided on a box pleat skirt. I was going to do a copy-cat of a dress I saw on Zooey Deschanel but I ended up making to many changes to it that it turned into more of a Dear Creatures type dress. So much for that lol! I kind of eyeballed the strips of white and then used a ruler to even it out. The collar was a last minute decision but I'm glad I included it. Collars are so great!

Regaining Motivation

I miss writing. Not like for blogging. But writing research papers, essays, op-eds, blahblahblah school stuff! I miss the assignments. I miss pretending to dread having to write a paper for english class all the while secretly loving it and being so excited to sit in front of my computer at 2 in the morning staring at a blank page on microsoft word.

I write all the time. In various notebooks that I never seem to finish, on my hands, countless diaries, little lists on sticky notes, my blog. But I don't write the way I used to. Don't get me wrong, I'm no Shakespeare! I can't write a novel to save my life. And to be quite honest my writing is average at best. But despite what I show here on this lil blog 'o mine English has always been my best and most favorite subject.

Maggie at Lifesize Paperdoll just unknowingly gave me a good kick in the pants. I'm feeling really inspired to get back into writing a bit more seriously.

A-line skirt obsession

So if you don't already know this, I have been completely obsessed with Ariana Grande since I started watching Victorious back in the day. Anyway I saw a picture floating around Pinterest of her in this adorable orange plaid a-line miniskirt. I think I saw it in November? Anyway I love  short skirts and short dresses so I was immediately drawn to it. I'm more of a full skirt kinda girl because they make me look a lot skinnier and they're just more flattering on me versus anything else but she looked so small and adorable in hers! And after Googling her like a maniac I gather we're roughly the same size. So if she can look nice in an a-line mini so can I.

I put it on my sewing list and amidst all the hustle and bustle of the holiday season I completely forgot about it. This morning I go on Pinterest, only for like five minutes of course, and it seemed like every other outfit pin incorporated a miniskirt. And most of them plaid!

1//2//3//4//5//6//7//8//9//10

Normally I'm not even into plaid! I can only think of a handful of things in my closet that are gingham/plaid: a dress, two shirts, and three skirts. But I guess the more I see it the more it grows on me.Whatevs, it's cute. PLUS there's a few bolts of plaid and gingham fabric on clearance at my job so that helps to make my decision. Sorry I don't have a picture of them but take my word for it- there are really pretty! Word association: Anyone else immediately think of picnics and Clueless when they hear 'plaid'? Looks like I'll be making some miniskirts soon!

Actually now that I'm looking at those last two sentences with my ring finger on the 'backspace' key that brings me to another thought... I would love to go on a picnic. Last one I can remember was 4th of July last summer. Before that I was a sophomore in high school! Y'all know I don't get out much....Does anybody else daydream about picnics? I mean the whole idea is so cute. And like the domesticated girl that I am my favorite part is the matching dish sets, preparing food and packing it up all pretty in gingham patterned baskets and blankets. Although it sounds good in theory I know that I'd get sick of hauling all that mess around. I'm totally cool with grabbing Mickey D's or any other fast food and sitting on a park bench and calling that a picnic.

Killers in the park // I made a thing!

We accept the love we think we deserve

We've all heard it a million times.
It's hard. It's really hard to get out of your own way sometimes.

I've pushed people away countless times. I always believed it was somehow better to leave before I was left. They were going to disappear sooner or later so at least this way it's on my own terms. I'll just beat them to the punch because it'll hurt less this way. I've let all my fears and insecurities drive me away from friends and family who truly care about me. And even from a few that I could have developed relationships with had I not run them off. If only I had allowed myself to trust. To allow someone to get close to me. To accept that maybe someone actually does care. Or at least wants to for whatever their reason may be.

"I, on the other hand, have not yet accepted a love. It’s not for lack of wishing though. I crave that kind of love and hope and wish for it on a daily basis. And while I have met a few guys who have in some way tried to take things to the next level, I have never felt (apart from 2 very separate occasions) compelled to give myself to a person in that way and let them in to my life. I know it sounds ridiculous and probably is very unrealistic, but I am constantly searching for my idea of perfection. I know what I want and I am not really willing to compromise. Unfortunately, it is this belief and this feeling within me that has probably held me back from being with at least a couple of guys now. But is this really a bad thing? Sure, at the grand old age of 24 I have yet to experience a lot of things even 16 year olds already have, but has it ultimately meant that I’ve saved myself from a lot of torment, heartache, embarrassment and time by not investing in the wrong people? I know they say you learn from your mistakes but I really don’t want certain significant events in my life to be mistakes. I want them to be glorious. I want to look forward to going a date. I want to get excited about the guy I’m going to see. I want to look back at a guy and feel nothing but warmth in my heart for him and the person he is. I want him to be intelligent and able to hold a conversation. I also would like him to be taller than me in my tallest boots! But most of all I want him to make me laugh."  -siof

"your own self esteem is the most valuable thing you own. too often people fall into relationships that are volatile and remain in them for as long as they think they can't do better. but underneath it all, they "can't do better" because they don't think they're worthy of greater things. if you think highly of yourself, you wouldn't let anybody walk all over you, right? so in love, if you know you're the equivalent of rainbows and unicorns, you should really only be with someone who also thinks you're amazing and treats you so."-Regina

While I agree with these two ladies, and they have very valid points, their feelings differ from my own. I'm not 'hiding myself away' because I believe that I deserve some fantastic person and 'refuse to settle.' I'm not putting myself in the arms of awful people because I 'don't think I can do better.'

I want to be loved. But I don't deserve it. I haven't done anything worthy of loving. Sure I'm a nice girl, and I do my best to keep those around me happy... But I just honestly don't feel like I'm good enough for anyone. I have nothing to offer.

For instance I went on a date recently and he was such a sweetheart. He was saying all the things I'd been dying to hear from a boy. He was a gentlemen, too. Opening doors, asking permission, making sure I was comfortable, the whole nine. But the entire time all I could do was question his every intention. I freaked out anytime he said something complimentary. Every move he made I tried to analyze. I told him that I know eventually he'll find something about me he doesn't like, get bored of me, or just something will make him leave because everyone always leaves. I don't know what I was thinking! I mean who does that?? For some reason I couldn't stop myself. He tried to reassure me that he plans on stickin around but I didn't hear a word he said. I want to believe him but something in me just gets sad and turns away. All these negative thoughts come into my mind. "That's what they all say. And where are they now? In the arms of someone else."  And I'm pretty sure he thinks I'm completely crazy by now. And he's half-right. Because it doesn't make any logical sense. Why would anyone in their right mind... just... just drive someone away who clearly wants to be there? I mean, he approached me for goodness sake! Ugh!

I'm mad at myself more than anything. I do this every. single. time. and then I wonder why I'm always alone. Is my self-esteem really that low? To the point that even when someone tells me something to my face I still can't accept it? My insecurities were really showing the entire night. Which is so sad. Because at my age I should really have a handle on that, but I don't.

Hello blog, it's been a whole week!

Hai guise!It's been a whole week, did ya miss me?

No? Oh, okay. Well I missed you! I've been a really busy bee this holiday season, as I'm sure most of you are. So I don't have as much time (or will power) to blog as frequently as I'd like this December. But here's a little peek of my days over the last week.

1&2: The living room now has 3 functions. My bedroom, the TV room, and my sewing room.

3: I bought this hat at Walgreens and I've worn it basically everyday since.

4: My nails haven't been this bad in my entire life. But because of work it's so hard to keep 'em pretty :(

5&6: I went to a tree trimming party on Saturday and I found this sweet ornament at Target!

Shamed at work + a random OOTD

Welp, it's finally getting cold over here.
My daily necessities are now tights, a sweater, and sometimes even gloves. I don't mind it though, wintery weather allows for cute tights and lots of fun layering! I actually ended up changing clothes right after these pictures... but I refused to do it all over again. See... what had happened was... I thought I was going to be walking to work today. And usually I'll wear shorts and tennis shoes. Once I get to work I change into my REAL outfit which is tucked neatly into my purse. But no one wanted to walk with me because they felt it was too cold (which it reaaally wasn't. I think they're just LAZY). I don't walk by myself anymore because it's not safe. Reluctantly I changed clothes and caught a taxi (because we also only have one car which was currently being driven around in another city).

Work today was cool.
Not any rude customers like on Sunday. Man they were gettin' on my LAST good nerve yesterday. But being the fabulous employee that I am I never let it show. I nearly lost my shiz when some customers I had noticed some not-so-pleasant scars on my arm and decided it was a good idea to tell me how offensive it was. I can't even tell you how upset I was. I mean, it was embarrassing and it made me feel a little ashamed and sad. But the more she kept talking the angrier I got that she could be so mean about it. Needless to say I ran to the break room to put my sweater back on until the end of the night. Luckily a friend I hadn't seen in quite a while (almost a year?) came in with his girlfriend. It always feels good to see familiar faces at work. But we didn't talk, like at all. Lol I guess I was still a little upset about that woman from earlier that my mind was somewhere else and I just didn't feel like making small talk. So that was that.



Side note:
Over the weekend I gave away a bunch of clothes.
It's a personal rule that when I buy new clothes I have to give away a bunch of old ones.

I went to Target and binged on stationary

• 2 roles of glitter tape
• 4 packs of notebooks with matching notepads
• 2 notepads with matching clipboards
• 3 packs of sticky notes
• Mechanical pencils
• Pens
• 1 set of zipper pouches
• 5 packs of lables and stickers
• 1 pack of assorted buttons
• 3 packs of greeting cards with matching envelopes

pls send help




Everything costs between $1 and $3! I always go straight to the dollar bins near the front entrance of Target before I do anything. So when I saw these earlier last week I 'bout lost my mind. I couldn't control myself. Whoever is on the design team behind these babies deserve an award!!! Everything is so pretty and cool.Matches my style so well. Very mis-matchy but still cohesive and girly.  


Target did that!!!

100 Wise Words from A High School Teacher

1.   There are plenty of ways to enter a pool. The stairs is not one of them.
2.    Never cancel dinner plans by text message.
3.    Don’t knock it ‘til you try it.
4.    If a street performer makes you stop walking, you owe him a buck.
5.    Always use ‘we’ when referring to your home team or your government.
6.    When entrusted with a secret, keep it.
7.    Don’t underestimate free throws in a game of ‘horse’.
8.    Just because you can doesn’t mean you should.
9.    Don’t dumb it down.
10.    You only get one chance to notice a new haircut.
11.    If you’re staying more than one night, unpack.
12.    Never park in front of a bar.
13.    Expect the seat in front of you to recline. Prepare accordingly.
14.    Keep a picture of your first fish, first car, and first boy/girlfriend.
15.    Hold your heroes to a high standard.
16.    A suntan is earned, not bought.
17.    Never lie to your doctor.
18.    All guns are loaded.
19.    Don’t mention sunburns. Believe me, they know.
20.    The best way to show thanks is to wear it. Even if it’s only once.
21.    Take a vacation of your cell phone, internet, and TV once a year.
22.    Don’t fill up on bread, no matter how good.
23.    A handshake beats an autograph.
24.    Don’t linger in the doorway. In or out.
25.    If you choose to go in drag, don’t sell yourself short.
26.    If you want to know what makes you unique, sit for a caricature.
27.    Never get your hair cut the day of a special event.
28.    Be mindful of what comes between you and the Earth. Always buy good shoes, tires, and sheets.
29.    Never eat lunch at your desk if you can avoid it.
30.    When you’re with new friends, don’t just talk about old friends.
31.    Eat lunch with the new kids.
32.    When traveling, keep your wits about you.
33.    It’s never too late for an apology.
34.    Don’t pose with booze.
35.    If you have the right of way, take it.
36.    You don’t get to choose your own nickname.
37.    When you marry someone, remember you marry their entire family.
38.    Never push someone off a dock.
39.    Under no circumstances should you ask a woman if she’s pregnant.
40.    It’s not enough to be proud of your ancestry; live up to it.
41.    Don’t make a scene.
42.    When giving a thank you speech, short and sweet is best.
43.    Know when to ignore the camera.
44.    Never gloat.
45.    Invest in good luggage.
46.    Make time for your mom on your birthday. It’s her special day, too.
47.    When opening presents, no one likes a good guesser.
48.    Sympathy is a crutch, never fake a limp.
49.    Give credit. Take blame.
50.    Suck it up every now and again.
51.    Never be the last one in the pool.
52.    Don’t stare.
53.    Address everyone that carries a firearm professionally.
54.    Stand up to bullies. You’ll only have to do it once.
55.    If you’ve made your point, stop talking.
56.    Admit it when you’re wrong.
57.    If you offer to help don’t quit until the job is done.
58.    Look people in the eye when you thank them.
59.    Thank the bus driver.
60.    Never answer the phone at the dinner table.
61.    Forgive yourself for your mistakes.
62.    Know at least one good joke.
63.    Don’t boo. Even the ref is somebody’s son.
64.    Know how to cook one good meal.
65.    Learn to drive a stick shift.
66.    Be cool to younger kids. Reputations are built over a lifetime.
67.    It’s okay to go to the movies by yourself.
68.    Dance with your mother/father.
69.    Don’t lose your cool. Especially at work.
70.    Always thank the host.
71.    If you don’t understand, ask before it’s too late.
72.    Know the size of your boy/girlfriend’s clothes.
73.    There is nothing wrong with a plain t-shirt.
74.    Be a good listener. Don’t just wait for your turn to talk.
75.    Keep your word.
76.    In college, always sit in the front. You’ll stand out immediately.
77.    Carry your mother’s bags. She carried you for nine months.
78.    Be patient with airport security. They’re just doing their jobs.
79.    Don’t be the talker in a movie.
80.    The opposite sex likes people who shower.
81.    You are what you do, not what you say.
82.    Learn to change a tire.
83.    Be kind. Everyone has a hard fight ahead of them.
84.    An hour with grandparents is time well spent. Ask for advice when you need it.
85.    Don’t litter.
86.    If you have a sister, get to know her boyfriend. Your opinion is important.
87.    You won’t always be the strongest or the fastest. But you can be the toughest.
88.    Never call someone before 9am or after 9pm.
89.    Buy the orange properties in Monopoly.
90.    Make the little things count.
91.    Always wear a bra at work.
92.    There is a fine line between looking sultry and slutty. Find it.
93.    You’re never too old to need your mom.
94.    Ladies, if you make the decision to wear heels on the first date, commit to keeping them on and keeping your trap shut about how much your feet kill.
95.    Know the words to your national anthem.
96.    Your dance moves might not be the best, but I promise making a fool of yourself is more fun than sitting on the bench alone.
97.    Smile at strangers.
98.    Make goals.
99.    Being old is not dictated by your bedtime.
100.    If you have to fight, punch first and punch hard.

Things I feel like I wanna do

We all have things that we want to do. Important stuff, friends stuff, school stuff, just STUFF. They usually come across our minds while doing something usually completely unrelated. Like the other day I was walking home from work and I got all these ideas about what I wanted to cook for Sunday dinner. Once I got home I completely forgot about it... until right now. I'll be watching something on TV and think hmmm I think I should finally just do that hair tutorial video. And then the episode I'm watching ends and I forget. I'll be putting the laundry away and say to myself Hey I really wanna do a blog post on blahblahblah. I put my clothes away, come back to the computer, and then stay on YouTube for an hour. Needless to say I forget to blog... for like 4 days.

I think the common denominator here is that I never write them down. I mean, I actually keep lists of things in a special notebook specifically intended for my endless lists of 'things.' However, I don't take it with me 100% of the time. More like 60% of the time. So I end up forgetting about a lot of things that I want to do. While I'm having all these bullet points swirling around in my head with things I'm thinking about doing (does anyone else think with actual numbered lists or bullet points??) I might as well blog about it. That way I'm obligated to go through with them. Not really, but it'll feeeeeel like I have a responsibility to follow through with it. Plus typing is a lot easier and faster than actually handwriting. So here we go:

• vlogging about the fun happenings at work
• cook something yummy for Sunday dinner
• actually do that hair tutorial video I've been putting off since January oops
• finish that jacket
• clean out & organize my shoes + closet
• charge my phone haha!
• hem my dress
• paint my nails
• find some opaque tights under $5
• make Danielle a tutu
• make Lydia a skirt
• get a pair of matching belly rings

That's all for now. But I can almost guarantee that I'll have at least 5 more things to add to this lists the moment I press "publish."   TTFN

Playing dress up at Target

Every now and then while I'm out and about I'll try a ton of clothes on that I have NO intentions of buying just as a feel-good experience. Last week I was doing some paperwork and I told my mom I'd be about 40-60 minutes so she could go run her errands until it was time to come back and get me. It didn't take as long as I anticipated so while I waited for my dear mother to come bqack I hopped on over across the parking lot and ran around through Target (one of my favorite places). I don't usually buy clothes here because... well idk why actually. But I haven't bought clothes here in quite a while. I saw a lot of pretty dresses on the juniors racks so I decided to snatch 'em up!!!

Window shopping and playing dress up are some of my favorite things :)

Have a great day guys!

What's in my everyday bag?!

So I completely forgot about linking up for the Sunday Social this week BUT I wanted to do this anyway. We're all a bit nosy (go on and admit it) And I love the 'What's in my bag' tag on YouTube. Like, I honestly don't know what it is about it that compels me to watch 73 videos of girls with janky handbags talk about the crazy mess inside. Whatever, I guess it's just a girl thing! Off we go!

1. What is your favorite handbag you’ve ever owned?

Hmmm well that's an easy one! My infamous orange tote/messenger bag from F21 I bought when I was 16. This baby has been with me through it all! It doesn't look like much but it's so bright and so roomy! When I was in high school it carried my notebooks, papers, pens, makeup bag, EVERYTHING! After about 4 1/2 year I'd say my baby is down right indestructible :) You wouldn't think it could hold much but believe me, I could smuggle triplets into Mexico no problemo.

2. What is your dream handbag you lust over?

This Hello Kitty tote from Loungefly *drools* Every purse I have (with the exception of dainty little shoulder bags) HAS to be durable, light-medium weight, big enough for me to fit my entire life into (or at least an extra pair of shoes if needed), and very very CUTESY. This one fits the bill. And while I'm at it, there's a wallet I'd love to have as well. Same brand, Loungefly. But it's Minnie Mouse and it has an attached kiss lock coin purse!

3. What are the daily essentials in your purse or work bag?

Chapstick, camera, phone, a pen, $$$, gum, *feminine products* because you just never know, if I have heels on I'll bring a pair of flats and of course my wallet. NON-NEGOTIABLE!

Friday Letters #1

Dear rainclouds, I'm not ready for you yet. However, it would really suck to have to deal with rain around Thanksgiving time... So if you don't mind can you please just get it over with now? Because you're making it hard for me to get dressed in the A.M. when you creep around all morning only to completely disappear in the afternoon.

Dear September, you came and went so fast! You're almost over but I can't say that I'll miss your wishy-washy transitional weather. Syonara.

Dear Fox.com, why do I have to be a member to watch the episode of New Girl I missed last week?!

Dear Netflix, can you pretty please with a cherry on top put all the latest seasons of my favorite shows on? You get me all hyped up on the first 7 seasons and then leave me hanging. I MEAN COME ON!!! I thought we had something special!

Dear Mexican grocery stores, I LOVE YOU FOREVER. I have been cheating on my usual grocery spots for a few years now and I think it's time you an I make it official. +You have the best tomatoes ever.

Dear Doctor Who, after catching up on all your seasons I have officially become a Whovian. But I still don't know how I feel about 12. We'll see how it goes after the first few episodes.

R.I.P. Summer 2013

This summer has been really good to me! Of course there were a few bad days but they were far and few in between. Fall is already off to a great start because as I've mentioned I GOT A JOB! I cannot tell you how proud I am of myself. Literally I giggle every time I think about it. My first day is sometime next week TBD. I've been blasting Christmas music since mid-August and I already have a million and one ideas floating around in my head about all things Christmas- decor, gifts, the works! Anyone else? I guess it's because I don't exactly celebrate Labor day or Halloween or anything so after my birthday is over in July, my brain goes straight to Thanksgiving + Christmas! I'm sure I'm not the only one, amirightladies? Really not sure when the time changes (Google here I come) but pretty soon the days will get shorter and the nights colder. So I guess this is syonara to all those lovely nights of  leaving the front door opened to feel the cool night breeze and hearing the sounds of crickets and cars passing by. The upside though? FALL+WINTER=CUDDLE SEASON That being said I have my blankets, knitwear, thigh high's and tights out. Got my Disney and B&W movies picked out, and Netflix alllll ready to go! Oh and Ice cream. Because it's never too cold for ice cream, never.

Bring it on fall and winter!