Thursday, January 17, 2013

Scribbles from Sappy New Years' Eve

Growing pains are the worst pains.
I thought I was one of the lucky ones. One of the “special snowflakes” that can navigate through their teenage years without an awkward phase.
This year I will be 20. I know, not very old. BUT in my very short 19 years, I feel like I’ve done so much, yet I’ve also missed out on a world of opportunities.
I take these last 5 or so years as a big list of WHAT NOT TO DO!
  • broken my own heart
  • tore myself down
  • missed out on amazing things because of fear
  • held myself back from having much needed conversations with certain people
  • disappointed myself
  • relapsed with my addictions
I’ve allowed
  • the opinions of others to be ridiculously more important than my own
  • people to walk all over me
  • others to tear me down and hurt me because that’s what I thought I deserved
  • myself to become a passive person
  • myself to become somewhat of a martyr
BUT I’ve also
  • built myself back up
  • gotten fit
  • acquired a good healthy diet/eating habits
  • learned to speak up for myself and be honest about what I need/want
  • allowed myself to be creative and imaginative
  • started making my own decisions about my life
  • come up with goal and actually achieved them
  • weeded out toxic people in my life
  • had fun and experimented with my ‘look’
  • laughed until I cried
  • gained much needed confidence

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